In the time before enlightenment:

            Before there was Wal-Mart, Lowe’s, and Target there were few places where a person could get the things he needed at a somewhat reasonable prices. One of these places, I’ll call it Sears seemed to be the answer. They had everything, but everything I got from them was a real problem. Nothing ever went right. One evening, after working late I went to resolve a long standing fight to get a 15 cent part which had cost upwards of $15 so far in UPS charges alone. I demanded to see the store manager, not the department manager. I was shown to his office and found him to be very helpful, but nervous. When I returned to my truck I glanced in the mirror and found a 2-inch streak of bright blue across my cheekbone. I had been working with colored inks and paints all day. The movie “Brave Heart” had just been released and was a big hit. That manager must have thought me a crazed Scots highlander with kilt, tam, and 2 handed Claymore sword waiting outside.

            He called me the next day and said he had the part (only $5.99) and if I would give him my card number, I could pick it up. I grabbed a tube of blue paint and smeared it across my cheek, and told him to “Stuff it!” I haven’t been in one of those stores since.

Punctuation:

            For the last few months, I have been working on a project with an editor on the West Coast. She is a Chinese lady named Si Zboom Ba Schaefer (pronounced Shay-fur). She is a cruel and pitiless taskmistress with a passion for commas. This woman has never met a dot or dot with a tail that she didn’t like. Unfortunately, I have never met one that I had any idea as to where it was supposed to be, so I just let them find their own homes. In the last 60 days or so, I have started to get the idea. Now I find myself audibly saying comma, period, semi-colon, and question mark as part of my normal conversation. The strange looks I get don’t bother me (space) (dash) (space) I’ve been getting those all my life (period)

Uncle Ed is still in Shock Therapy... but will return soon.

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

–  One Man Standing – And  available Now – Rubio

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