The Error of their Ways:

            For about 30 years, I have been tracking the accuracy of our local weathermen. It ain’t good folks. They have got us snookered and they can’t lose. When one says, “12 to 14 inches of snow and a temperature of –8 degrees,” we are more likely to get 8 inches of snow and a temperature of +6 degrees. Or in July, they may predict 105 degrees and it may only get to 93. Do we criticize and blaspheme their profession? No. We know they made a mistake, but we somehow give them credit for not letting it get so bad. When they are wrong we consider it like getting a discount on something already on sale. When was the last time you made a mistake and were thanked for it?

Handwriting:

How many of you missed National Handwriting Day on January 23? A show of hands please. Yeah I thought so – no ink smudged fingers in this bunch. I went to the National Handwriting Convention in Omaha and all 3 of us sat around and made row upon row of little ovals – ahh, the Palmer Method. For those of you who have never sat in Miss Marie Schaefer’s class, or who aren’t familiar with the Palmer Method, go ask your grandmother about it. 

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

How does she do that?

            During the recent snow, while the driveway was yet untouched, I stood and watched Avon back out, turn, and head toward the road. Looking at her tracks, I was flabbergasted. There were 2 lines running absolutely straight – her front wheels fit perfectly into the tracks of her rear wheels. I could have taken a chalk line and marked them and not seen a millimeter of variance. The most amazing thing is, how starved I must be for entertainment.

It’s all how you look at it:

            A friend was showing me pictures of her grandchildren. There were 3 of them the products of 2 daughters. She came to the single one and with a loving light in her eyes said, “And this is my little mule.” Surprised, I asked why she called him a mule, and she said, “Because his daddy was a real Jackass.”

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

New readers need to know:

            One of my new subscribers asked if this blog was offensive. I told him that so far no one has complained that is was, but that I was still working on that.

Things that Make Me Smile:

(Another Pottsy Tale:)

            * I love Polish weddings; those big noisy friendly affairs with lots of food, drink, and music. My afore mentioned sometimes friend, Pottsy and I crashed one in E. St. Louis one time. Pottsy had the nerves of a cat burglar. We were soon found out, and were told to enjoy ourselves, but not to leave with anything we didn’t come in with, which meant anything from the gift table or anything female. Several years later I was a minor role player in another Polish wedding…   Avon’s. I thoroughly enjoyed that one too despite the hangover. The thing that makes me smile the most about ours is I don’t ever have to do it again.  

         

* I also smile when I have been reading and my eyes suddenly pop open and I discover that I had dosed off. The real pleasure of this is when I realize that I hadn’t missed a thing and can pick up right where I left off or even get an instant replay of the last few paragraphs. Unlike those Teebo or Teevo things my process is low tech, extremely reliable, and free. I especially smile about the free part.

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

Swimming in a River:

            While watching 2 boys swimming in a river a British travel writer HV Morton wrote: “All the time, although you are unaware of it, your brains are storing every fraction of these moments. …you will always remember it although the names and faces of women you have known will become like ghosts in your minds.”

                                                                                                                                           

  H V Morton, 1933

A Memory of Swimming in a River:

            During an outing to the St. Francis River my brother, Fidel, and I were fortunate enough to coax our sister (the princess) out to a pile of rocks and gravel in the middle. We had to tow her out because she couldn’t swim a stroke. When we got her firmly established on a big rock we left her stranded there presumably forever. She set up a howl that could be heard in Poplar Bluff and our dad, Braddy, had to go get her. We got in some trouble, but Braddy was easy; I’ll bet he was just sorry that he was too grown up to have pulled that stunt. The princess has forgiven us; she knows we wouldn’t have left her out there for more than a week. H V Morton was right.

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

New readers need to know:

            One of my new subscribers asked if this blog was offensive. I told him that so far no one has complained that is was, but that I was still working on that.

Clocks Say the Darndest Things:

            As I was waking up the other morning my body was telling me to get up and get the kinks and little pains worked out. My mind was telling me, “Don’t listen to that fool I’m the brains of this outfit.” So I rolled over and looked at the clock, which was telling my mind in big red letters that it was SOY! “What,” my mind shouted, “what does that mean? Soy what?” By that time my mind was awake and I looked again at the clock, showed me in big blocky digital figures that it was 5:04 or SOY if you are a bit foggy headed. I have decided not to pay any attention to my brain; it can’t even tell time. 

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

Looking in the Mirror:

            Have you ever taken a good honest look at yourself? You know what I mean; those long serious self evaluations where you weigh all of your plusses and minuses, and you find that your minuses are winning. You probe into the deepest cracks and crevasses of your conscience. You know all the things you’ve done wrong, the things you wish you hadn’t done, the things you’d like to forget, and you hope that no one else remembers. Have you?

Well, I sure haven’t….. Let sleeping dogs lie, is my motto.

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com

Valentine Suggestions:

            With St. Valentine’s Day quickly approaching I want to offer some advice to both sexes. To the gentlemen I’d say do your best, try and think like a woman – that’s a hard one, but give it your best effort. It could be well worth your time. A fella I once knew got his wife a Weed Eater for a Valentine gift; it was red, so he felt pretty good about his romantic side. He doesn’t seem to be married at present. Don’t be like that guy get her something that a girl would like, and if you can’t come up with something at least give her a nice card – they sell them at the Card Outlet for 59 cents. As for the ladies my advice is Don’t Expect Too Much; you knew we were men when you married us.  

LB, editor... (I like to call myself the editor so I think I'm in charge)

Random Thought:

Have you ever wondered what ever happened to Quinn the Eskimo? He never did get here.

 Books by Lou Bradshaw available on Amazon Kindle

 A Fine Kettle of Fish – Hickory Jack – Blue – Ace High – Blue Norther – Cain

And  available Now –  One Man Standing – Coming soon – Rubio

Visit me on Facebook Lou Bradshaw Artist – Author or www.facebook.com/loubradshawarts

Or you can contact me at loubradshaw7@gmail.com